Making youtube videos to tell everyone that you’re “not dead” never was and never will be clever/funny. Unless the newspaper accidentally printed an obituary about you. Then you’ll probably want to post one ASAP. Or you could totally do what I would do and milk it for all it’s worth.

Think of all the awesome stuff that you could do if everyone thought that you were dead. For instance, you could haunt the shit out of people that you don’t like. Plus you could totally skip all the boring family holidays, like anyone’s birthday that isn’t yours. Or you could not skip them and freak everyone out. I mean, yes, there’s a general theme of being scary when it comes to being a ghost. But who cares? You have nothing better to do. You’re dead. Technically. Or not technically. I don’t know which one it is at this point.

Although, I guess it all really depends on how the obituary said that you died. Because if it’s something sad like cancer then you should probably just come right out and be like “jayplay, you guys, I’m still here.” But if it’s hilarious like “died petting too many bunnies in spite of severe allergies” then I say fucking go for it. Half because that’s hilarious and half because that’s probably the cutest way to die ever.

-The Gay